A year ago yesterday, my sister-in-law died. No warning, no notice, no chance to say goodbye. For 22 years we shared life and a family. Over those years we developed a deep connection. Losing her has left a significant void in my life. A hole that hasn’t been filled. As the anniversary of her death […]

The recordings in our minds are often the problem we need to address to grow. We all have to deal with them. Clients that struggle with anxiety often hear the same kind of message: “My anxiety feels like a sign of weakness.” Our image of strength is self-assured, confidant, and decisive. Anxiety feels like the […]

At some point in the last generation or so we decided that having a high self-esteem was the secret to a happy and fulfilled life. It seems logical: if you feel good about who you are and what you are good at everything else falls into place, right? We work hard at improving our self-esteem and […]

I don’t like conflict. I never have. At times I have gone to great lengths to avoid conflict. Yet I want to grow and I want to have healthy relationships. I see this with my clients all the time: we want to avoid friction in relationships but we also want to grow. But there is […]

Pain hurts. But it is also a gift. Pain is helpful for understanding what is happening beneath the surface. Naturally, we work hard to avoid feeling pain. Who wants to feel disappointment, loneliness, heartbreak, insecurity, or anxiety? But the reality is that pain is part of who we are. When we avoid it we cut […]